A Tool For The Man Who Has Everything
Remember that really cool saw firemen use to cut into cars and doors for a rescue? Ever have a moving day when you couldn’t get the couch in the door?
Can’t get that pool table into your living room?? Party sauna won’t fit in the basement?? Use Cranky’s new "Make-A-Door" and turn that useless standard sized door into a spacious new double door in minutes!!
You wanna save a life? Call Fire and Rescue, but to handle all those tedious pre-party honey-doos, call 1-800-giv-shit now! For a free demonstration on YOUR door!
Batteries and/or fuel NOT included. Manufacturer NOT responsible for damage or loss due to use of this product. Accessories to rebuild door sold seperately for double the original cost. Complaints and or inquires: send self addressed stamped envelope to: 435 Eat Me St., FU, USA 696969 or call 1-800-giv-shit.
Not recommended for children or irate wives. WARNING!! Use of this product while under the influence of alcohol voids limited warranty. Product non-refundable and returnable ONLY when returned with original packaging seal unbroken, undamaged, and while living in the state of confusion. You break it, you buy it. Offer void where prohibited and banned in over 50 states. Patent pending for about 5 sec. Only plastic trees and fake crash dummies were used in the making of this commercial. Product made only of man-made materials under strict manufacturing guidelines by the inmates and associates of Manuel Noreaga prison.